Square in Bar
by Ron Kurtus (11 May 1971)
Human nature humor
(Not too good)
MALE: Hi. My name's Ron.
FEMALE: So what?
MALE: Ah - would you care to dance?
FEMALE: I don't know. I'm kind of tired.
MALE: Come on. This music's real groovy.
FEMALE: Weeell, OK.
MALE: My name's Ron.
MALE: What's your name?
FEMALE: Oh, I suppose I'll have to tell you. It's Betty.
MALE: That's a nice name.
FEMALE: Yeah. Groovy.
MALE: What's your last name?
FEMALE: It's ah... It's Smith. Yeah. Betty Smith.
MALE: That's an easy name to remember.
FEMALE: Uh huh. Well, it's been nice dancing with you. I got to rest
MALE: Could I buy you a drink?
FEMALE: Sure. Go ahead. I don't care what you do.
MALE: You go to college or work or what?
FEMALE: You're full of questions aren't you? Just because I let you
buy me a drink doesn't mean I'm going to tell you my life story.
MALE: Oh, I'm sorry. I didnt mean to pry. I'm going to the University.
FEMALE: Yeah, you look like the studious type. I'll bet you're a real
MALE: In Physics you have to read alot. Do you like to read?
FEMALE: Yeah, sure. I read a book every night before I go to bed.
MALE: Oh, you do? That's wonderful. What sort of books do you like
FEMALE: Comic books. Man, you're too much. fi Here's the girl with
your drink. F I can see that. Didnt you order anything?
MALE: No. I don't usually drink. On occasion, I'll have wine with
my meal, but other than that I abstain.
FEMALE:Geez. I got a real winner here. Well, here's mud in your eye.
FEMALE: It's just an expression. Boy, if this place wasnt so dead,
I could get someone cool to dance with.
MALE: Oh, do you want to dance again?
FEMALE: No, I'm still resting.
MALE: OK. You know, this is kind of a neat place.
FEMALE: Yeah. Real swell.
MALE: You come here often?
FEMALE: I'll bet you come here all the time. Every night.
MALE: l No. This is my first time here.
FEMALE: I'll bet you just wear those glasses as a disguise to make
yourself look square.
MALE: No. I have to wear these all the time. My vision is very poor.
20 - 100.
FEMALE: What do you study in school?
MALE: Physics. I'm in graduate school in Physics.
FEMALE: You graduate in Physics? Does that have anything to do with
MALE: Yes, it does. It's a very interesting subject.
FEMALE: Yeah, you'll have to tell me all about it. But some other
MALE: Oh, you're really interested in learning about Physics2
FEMALE: Nothing better I'd like to do than to have a long talk about
Physics. In fact my friends and I often discuss the subject. soy, you
are really dense.
MALE: I thought you really were interested in it. (Dejected)
FEMALE: I didnt mean to make fun of you. I was just kidding. I work
over (Apologizing) over at E.L.M. I'm an assembler. What was your name,
FEMALE: I come here once in a while, if there's nothing else to do.
I like to sit around and drink and have a few dances.
MALE: Say Betty, do you want to screw?